A collection of questions that will liven up conversations with friends. Talk themes to deepen your bond.
Looking for conversation starters that naturally liven up chats with friends? With social media everywhere, there should be plenty of shared topics.
Still, it’s not always easy to think of them, and figuring out how to ask the first question can be tricky.
So this time, we’re introducing a set of classic questions that can help deepen your conversations with friends or even spark them in the first place.
These are all questions that can reveal new sides of the other person, help you share values, and bring you closer.
Give them a try in your next conversation!
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A collection of deep questions to build closer relationships (1–10)
What would you like for your last meal?
Meals in our daily lives are an essential element for living a fulfilling life, aren’t they? Among those meals, there’s a classic discussion topic: talking about what would be the most fitting final meal to conclude one’s life.
Would you choose a luxurious feast, or something that’s familiar and part of your everyday routine? The differing perspectives here are what make the conversation lively.
If foods that changed your life or little-known dishes make an appearance, it can also help broaden everyone’s culinary knowledge.
Share the stories connected to those foods as well, and aim to build empathy through them.
If you could meet just one person, who would you want to meet?
This is a question that asks people to think about whom they would like to meet if they could meet anyone—whether a famous person or someone close to them.
From their choice of person, you might get a glimpse of their roots, such as who influenced them and at what points in their life.
Sometimes admiration is so strong that they actually don’t want to meet the person, so let’s also explore where they draw the line for someone they’d want to meet and how they think about it.
It could also be interesting to consider what they would want to tell that person if they actually met.
What’s something you end up doing without thinking?
Let’s each present the little habits we do unconsciously in daily life and use them as conversation starters.
You can have fun with all kinds of patterns—from quirks that only you do to habits that, in fact, everyone shares.
The habits people present might spark memories of an even wider range of quirks.
If you can’t think of your own, it might be good to have someone else point them out.
Being told about habits you hadn’t noticed yourself can be a bit embarrassing, but it also makes you realize how much that person is paying attention to you.
What are your memories of the theme park?
Theme parks exist not only in Japan but also overseas, and they vary widely in size, so people likely have their own unique images of what a theme park is.
With that in mind, let’s talk about the places that come to mind when you hear “theme park,” as well as memories associated with them.
It could be fun to find shared memories about famous places everyone knows, or to focus on each person’s local theme parks.
Questions to Get Closer Through Deep Conversations (11–20)
What was your childhood dream?
As we spend our days busy, we have fewer chances to think back on the past.
In times like that, asking what dream you had as a child can be a good prompt to reflect on each person’s journey.
Let’s try to remember who we were back then—what kind of person we were, what sparked our dream, and what kind of dream we had.
For many, that dream has changed along the way, so it might also be interesting to focus on how it has evolved.
What gestures do you like in the opposite sex?NEW!
People perceive the gestures of someone they’re interested in differently; it’s a point where differences in taste show.
Let’s turn beloved gestures of the opposite sex into questions and see how well we understand each other’s preferences.
Depending on how one answers, we may glimpse not only the questioner’s tastes but also the respondent’s.
It’s a fun topic not only as a shared conversation starter but also as a chance to discover new ways of thinking.
The more someone recognizes they’re in the minority, the higher the difficulty of the questions becomes.
When do you feel like you’ve become an adult?
Let’s have everyone think about moments when they felt their way of thinking had changed from childhood—when they realized they’d become an adult.
Since this invites people to reflect on their childhood, it could naturally lead into themes like childhood memories.
There may be some negative images, such as feeling like one has lost their purity, but if many people can relate, it should liven up the atmosphere.
To keep it from becoming too somber, it might also be good to focus on the honest heart and purity that haven’t changed since childhood.
What’s in your wallet?
Check what’s inside each person’s wallet and use it as a conversation starter.
If you announce the check in advance, some people might prepare beforehand, so doing a surprise check is recommended to see a more natural state.
Of course, you should compare how much cash everyone has, but make sure to look carefully at non-cash items too.
If someone happens to be carrying a lot of money, asking how they plan to use it could lead to an interesting story.
If there are loyalty cards or receipts in the wallet, you might get a glimpse into each person’s lifestyle and the conversation could really take off.
Complexes?
A topic everyone can probably come up with when asked is their complexes; even though each person’s worries are different, it can make for lively conversation.
Things you normally wouldn’t want to say might work as a funny story in the atmosphere of a drinking party.
By talking about them, you may realize they’re not such a big deal, or you might bond with someone who has the same complex—there can be plenty of positives.
However, at a drinking party with people you’re not yet close to, this kind of topic might be unwelcome, so be mindful of the distance before bringing it up.
What’s something you can only talk about now?
Doesn’t everyone have stories that, while not funny at the time, turned into good laughs as the years went by? Tales of student-era romances or rookie mistakes at work—these conversations, which connect across each person’s own genre, can really liven up a drinking party.
That said, some stories still aren’t laughable if they’re ongoing, so choose your material based on the people present and the mood.
On the other hand, talking about something you’ve been carrying alone for a long time can make you feel lighter, so this is a conversation theme I highly recommend trying.