[Ultimate Either-Or] A great conversation starter and a chance to get to know each other!
Have you heard of the ultimate either-or questions? They’re two-choice questions where it’s hard to pick one, but you have to choose, and they can reveal a person’s values and spark conversation.
They’re perfect as conversation starters with friends or partners and for getting to know each other.
In this article, I’ll introduce a collection of ultimate either-or questions related to life and personal values.
There are plenty of prompts that will make you agonize over which to choose, so have fun giving them a try!
- [Ultimate Choice?] A two-option love quiz that reveals the other person’s views on romance
- [Talk] Interesting! Hilarious! A Collection of Silly Questions
- A collection of questions that will liven up conversations with friends. Talk themes to deepen your bond.
- A collection of fun questions with the theme “What if 〇〇?”
- Fun two-player games recommended that you can play using conversation only
- With friends or couples! A set of questions perfect for penalty games
- A collection of hilarious questions that will liven up the conversation and might help you learn more about the other person
- A collection of personality quizzes perfect for killing time
- A collection of questions to liven up phone calls with someone you like or are interested in
- Personality Test: Fun! Psychology Test Collection
- [Challenging and Fun!] Quizzes & Riddles for Adults
- [Talk Theme] Liven up the drinking party! A roundup of funny questions
- [Battle of Wits] Stimulate your intellectual curiosity! Quiz questions that get adults excited
Ultimate Choices in Life and Values (11–20)
If you were to be reborn, which would you choose? Male or female?
What would my everyday life be like if I were born a different gender from who I am now? Just imagining this ultimate either-or makes me a little excited.
If you choose male, you might be drawn to having a different build or social role, thinking things like, “Physical work might be easier,” or “I’d like to try being taller.” If you choose female, you might picture a broader range of lifestyle options, like “I want to enjoy fashion more,” or “It seems like there are many ways to live.” Of course, both have their fun and their challenges, and there’s no single right answer.
What’s interesting is that this question can lead you to notice both “what’s good about being who I am now” and the importance of “imagining yourself in someone else’s position.”
Which one do you want to go to? The past or the future?
If you had a time machine, where would you like to go? If you choose the past, many people might do so because they want to redo certain events or meet someone dear to them once more.
On the other hand, the future is a world no one has seen yet.
There’s an alluring mix of excitement and a little nervousness—wondering what you’ll be like and how society will have progressed—that makes you want to take a peek.
The interesting part is that your choice reveals how you see the present and what you’re hoping for.
It’s a classic either-or question that’s easy to get people talking and quickly broadens the conversation.
Which would you rather have: 10,000 yen or 100 lottery tickets?
This question asks whether you would choose a guaranteed 10,000 yen or aim for a larger amount that’s uncertain.
It also seems likely to reveal differences in how much expectation people place on lotteries.
Beyond the goal of a dramatic, one-shot comeback, it might be interesting to focus on whether it’s actually a good deal if you think of using that 10,000 yen to buy 100 lottery tickets.
Because the amounts are concrete, it could be even more engaging to include calculation in the decision-making, not just expectations.
If your body could only touch either dogs or cats, which would you choose?
A classic theme for provoking opposing opinions is asking people to choose between being a “dog person” or a “cat person.” Let’s take that theme a step further and ask: if you could only touch one of them, which would you choose? Some might pick the one they’ve never touched before due to allergies, while others might say they’re satisfied just watching and don’t need to touch either—so not everyone will simply choose the animal they like more.
By using the word “touch,” this question doesn’t just ask about favorite animals; it also reveals how people relate to each animal.
If you had to date someone who’s careless with either money or time, which would you choose?
This is a question that makes you think about which kinds of major flaws in a partner you could tolerate.
Because being careless with money or time are flaws that directly affect daily life, you can also sense what each person values in their day-to-day living.
Try to vividly imagine life with someone who’s lax in each of these ways, and consider how you’d feel and how it would impact your life.
Some may say that “lax” depends on the degree, so it could be fun to discuss the differences in what level you’d be willing to accept.
If you could go to either the future or the past, which would you choose?
Time machines, time loops, and other time-related concepts are classic themes in science fiction and beyond.
This question asks: if you could jump through time, would you go to the past or the future? It may reveal whether you’re more interested in the history the world has walked or the future it’s heading toward.
Some people might want to see the distant past or future where they themselves don’t exist, while others might be curious about their own past or what their future self will be like.
Ultimate Life and Values Dilemmas (21–30)
If there were an elixir of immortality, would you drink it or not?
Here’s a question that asks you to imagine there’s an elixir of immortality right in front of you and to consider how you would deal with it.
Through this question, one can also get a sense of your views on the length of life.
Immortality is a staple of fantasy, and stories often portray the suffering that comes from living forever, so answers may differ depending on how familiar one is with such narratives.
Although it’s essentially a question of whether you would choose immortality, the premise that the potion exists might also lead to ideas about other ways to use it—such as selling it for money.